Let Your Light So Shine

One of the little angels killed in last Friday's awful shooting in Newtown, CT, was 6-year old Emilie Parker. To the left is her picture.

She was an artist who always carried around her crayons and paper, just in case there was some artistic inspiration that hit her. She had two younger sisters, and from what I heard her grief-stricken father say, they always turned to her for comfort. Her dad was teaching her Portuguese and one of the last things she said to him was, "Eu te amo", which means, I love you. She and her family moved from Ogden, UT to CT less than a year ago when her dad accepted a new job. They're going to take her body back to UT for burial.

There are a lot of other stories about these beautiful children. One could write a book about the heroes who tried to save them. I weep for them. I literally weep when I read about them or hear a story on the television about them.

I also hear of those who have dropped everything to go to CT to be with these suffering people. I heard last night about "comfort dogs" who were taken to Newtown so that grieving families could pet them and hug them. I heard about three people who drove 1000 miles just to give hugs to the survivors.

I also watched as the good people of this country came together to support those who lost loved ones in the shooting in CO some time ago. I have watched members of my own ward and stake go to New Jersey and New York to help those who lost so much to Hurricane Sandy. My heart has been warmed as I watched the nation band and rally together to give aid, comfort, money, time and effort to those in need.

I've even read stories about how NFL players this past weekend wrote the names of the CT victims on their shoes, and how the normally stringent uniform police of the NFL have looked the other way. Yes, there is a lot of good in this world, if you watch for it.

But now it's time to stop watching. The time has come to put the doctrine of Christ to the test, to put my beliefs to action. How can I help these families? How can I be more like the Savior and show Him how much I love Him? By doing something!

I don't propose driving all the way to CT, but I do propose donating to some of these causes and by being active in my own community. For instance, Emilie's parents are going to take her back to UT for burial this week. They are short on money to do so. A fund has been started in her name on Facebook to which I can donate. It's called the Emilie Parker Fund and is located here.

And there are others. Some of them are:

• Dawn Lafferty Hochsprung Memorial Fund, CT Teachers Credit Union, P.O. Box 2121, Waterbury, Conn. 06722
• Friends of the Engel Family Fund
• Noah's Ark of Hope Fund
• If you really do want to drive to CT and volunteer, you can call (800) 203-1234. That number will get you in touch with someone who can help.
• Sandy Hook School Support Fund, c/o Newtown Savings Bank, 39 Main St., Newtown, Conn. 06470.
• Newtown Memorial Fund, P.O. Box 596, Botsford, Conn. 06404

There are others, too I'm sure, but the point is this: it's time to let our light so shine, to put the Spirit of Christ and Christmas to action. Let your influence be felt in this world. After all, it's our responsibility to leave this world a better place than it was when we got here!

Emilie sure did.

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Put The Man Back Together

I learned of last Friday's killings at Sandy Hook Elementary School as I was walking back to my desk after a nice lunch out. A vendor friend of mine told me about it as he received an alert on his phone. As were you, I'm sure, I was deeply affected by it. I even shed tears on several occasions.

I feel the worst, though, for those who are left behind to pick up the pieces of their shattered lives. I don't worry about the kids who died as much as I do about their parents and families. The kids are fine, nestled safely in the arms of Him who loves us all. But the families must now make sense of this whole sordid thing, and many children who were not shot will be scarred for the rest of their lives. Who knows what terrible thoughts were bred by this one person's actions?

Early on I thought, "Only a coward would do such things and then take his own life. Only a coward." To some extent I still feel that way. A coward will do things and then fail to stick around to face the music, the consequences of those actions.

But over the weekend I've reflected on this again and again. I've watched the pundits and their words of "wisdom" and have listened to all of their arguments for this and for that. I've heard them argue about gun control. I've heard the President say that "we can't tolerate this anymore." I've heard that it's the media's fault. I've heard it from 101 different angles.

But after sitting in our High Priest Group meeting yesterday and listening to the lesson, I've come to my own conclusions. Take it for what it is, my opinion.

First, this is NOT a gun control issue. YES, get assault rifles and such out of the hands of the average citizen. I can see that. No one needs those for hunting or anything else. They were made for war, and last time I checked there isn't one going on in the United States.

I'm not a gun rights zealot by any stretch, (though I do possess my conceal permit) but I do believe in the Constitution. I believe it was a God-inspired document that unfortunately has seen much better days. But though it may have been weakened drastically in the last 30 years, the 2nd amendment is part of that document. Though it may have been meant for simpler time, the right to bear arms is still necessary...and MAY be even more necessary in years to come. But that's another issue altogether.

Second, this is not solely a media problem, though I do think that if it weren't all over your tv screen this kind of person might think twice before doing something so heinous. Having been in the media and having seen what goes on behind the scenes, I can empathize with those who believe the media glorify those who perpetrate such foul deeds. We have to know everything about them. We scrutinize their upbringing, the meds they were taking, the courses they took in high school and the fact that they wet the bed at night. Like John Wilkes Booth, those who do such things think they'll become famous and will be known forever, maybe even revered. I can see this, but still don't believe it's the media's fault.

Third, this is not only a mental health issue. Sure, there is something wrong with these people. How else could you go into an elementary school and start killing innocent children? Some screw somewhere is seriously too tight.

Fourth, this is not solely an education problem, either. Yes, we need to teach our children better. Yes, we need to help them understand the consequences of their actions. Yes, they need to know that they are responsible and NOT entitled to ANYTHING.

Nope. All of those are just symptoms. What this is is a LOVE problem, a turning to the Lord problem, a listening more to the adversary than obeying the commandments of the Lord problem.

Listen to what a prophet of God said regarding this.

"By following the teachings of the Lord, by turning unto Him and repenting of sin, by going about doing good, we may have peace and happiness and prosperity. If mankind will love one another, the hatred and the unkindness that have existed so much in the world will pass away." George Albert Smith

Did you just read what I did? Hatred and unkindness would pass away IF we will love one another. And how do we do that? Listen to the same man.

“This world is in a critical condition. War will not cease and the strife in this world will not end until the children of men repent of their sins and turn to God and serve Him and keep His commandments.”

So there's the answer to all of the unbelievably insane and sickening things that are happening now in our world.

• Repent of our sins
• turn to God
• serve Him
• keep His commandments

Sound like anything you've heard before?

Sound like something the Savior tried to teach 2000+ years ago and has been teaching through His prophets ever since? And people ask me why we could possibly need a prophet today. I guess this answers that question.

Listen to one more quote from President Smith.

“We are all under the obligation of making this world a happier place for our having lived in it."

You know what that tells me?

This Connecticut thing is MY problem.

The reason these things are happening is partially because of me. I need to get closer to my God. I need to serve Him better. I need to keep His commandments a little bit better. I need to make my influence felt in this world. Once I do that, at least part of the world will be a better place.

Years ago I heard a story about a man who was doing some work for his job from his home. His son was playing with his toys nearby and making a lot of noise, causing the dad to not be able to concentrate very well. Quickly flipping through a magazine he saw lying nearby, he tore out a page containing a picture of the earth taken from the moon. He tore it up into many small pieces and giving it to his son said, "I'd like you to put this puzzle of the world back together. When you do that, I'll stop working and will play with you." The son, anxious to have his dad play with him, accepted the "puzzle" and started working on it. The dad, thinking he'd have a good hour of quiet time ahead, settled back down to his work.

After five minutes the boy came back with the picture all put back together, and said to his dad, "I've got it all done, dad!" The father was greatly surprised and said, "Son, how did you do this so quickly?"

The son replied, "Well, I knew that putting the world back together would take me a long, long time, so I turned the page over and saw the picture of a man. I just put the man back together and the world took care of itself."

So it is in this situation. If I can put the man back together correctly, this world will heal itself, and all of the hatred and unkindness will pass away.

You see, it's not gun control.

It's not education control.

It's not media control.

It's self control.

---------------------------------

An Evening With John Fascenda

From distant kingdoms folk beat long
To beam their visage dark and black.
Wrought cages 'round their crowns they bore,
And armor to defend their back.

A pleasing land of tundra numb,
Of dreams before the half-shut eye
Of booty since collected, n'er
For several years, now glorify.

Still beat the feet of one so proud.
Four times the prize had ridden home,
Just to be grabbed and born from thence.
For this the chieftan lord did roam.

The verdant green of pastures lay
Athwart his back and fore his breast.
The missile settled in his grip,
A grimaced face by priests long blessed.

The lines were drawn, the battle raged
And lo, a battered colonnade.
One chieftan fell and carted off
Beneath the tattered flags they made.

Their blood upon the pitch was spilt,
And sweat and tears the trenches filled.
The honored mud from ages past
Laid dripping from their iron will.

Until the hour when bomb was hurled
Through air and space and downy flake,
No man could choose the victor there,
Nor battered pawn their hope forsake.

But once the fell advance was won,
Just one could wear the laurel crown.
The epic contest now complete,
Glist'ning spoils on sprinkled ground.

Disciples gazed, gripped with delight.
Guerdon prize raised above the rest.
With cracking voice the chieftan praised,
"The Forty-Niners are the best!"

The Stream That Runs Through My Brain

The ducks swim faster than I can run, I bet. They have hoods on their heads. I guess that's why they call them hooded mergansers.

A new email! Oh, they want me to donate my blood. Yea, I don't think so. Why would I do that when it hurts and makes me feel woozy?

One time, while I was on my mission, my Argentine companion donated blood and thought he would be incapacitated for several days. I told him that wasn't true, that he'd only be weak for a little while. He didn't believe me, but I was proven right. I never did get along with him very much. He took a nap every day during lunch and we didn't work. What that has to do with the ducks, I don't know.

I wonder sometimes what's really inside my brain. I know there's grey matter and a big pink thing in there, but really, how does my brain work? A bird just flew past my window and another duck swam past on the shimmering pond. Geez! That light shines right in my eyes. I can barely see them. Maybe I should put down my blinds.

You know, the first time they took blood out of me, two little test tubes worth, I fainted and fell on the floor like a sack of old spuds. I awoke in the chair with a nurse hovering over me, rubbing the back of my neck and shoving an ammonia capsule up my nose. I learned from that experience and never watched them take it again. So far, so good. I'm not very good with the sight of blood. Makes me feel oogy.

I'd like to be more observant. Maybe I should take a class or something. I don't notice what people wear and I can't remember what I ate for lunch yesterday. I'll remember tomorrow what I eat today, though. Papa John's pizza with peperoncinies. Yea, baby!

What was that? Oh, just a car going by out in the parking lot. Quick! Look again! Nope, just a car.

That hole in my tooth is getting larger, I think. I can fit my tongue into it quite easily now. I'm too chicken to go to the dentist about it. I know they're going to want to yank a couple of teeth out of my head, or give me another root canal or two. I'm too much of a sissy to have to endure that again. I'll just have to die with it the way it is. I can see it now. Some day, thousands of years from now, some archeologist will dig me up, look at my mouth and think I'm a missing link.

That's what all of those ...

A helicopter! I wonder what he's doing flying around here. Looking for something, I bet. Maybe some dope. You know, it shows up purple from the air. Not sure why. I was in a helicopter once. Pretty fun to fly around like that. I'd like to learn to fly, but I'm poor and can't afford the lessons. Too bad. I would have make a great helicopter pilot.

What was I thinking about? Oh, yea. All of those "missing links" and huge skulls they find. Just normal people who had not-so normal deformities. They're not a different species or anything like that. I think if those guys knew that archeologists were digging them up and calling them missing links they would get a big kick out of it. "I'm just a regular guy with an abnormally large forehead, not some forerunner to modern man." I can hear the snickering now.

Squirrel!!

Maybe I should go into the lab and get some work done. The ducks are congregating. Whoa, there's another car parking in the lot. I wish I could park in that lot. It's right next to my window, for pete's sake. But no. I have to park in the back and walk a half mile to my cube when I could walk about 25 feet. Who is that getting out of the car? Just some guy. He can't see me look at him. I could make faces at him and he'd never know. The windows are too reflective.

Wow, how many ducks are there? Hmm, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven...

Who is that that just walked by my window? Just some guy. I should really get some work done. Drink some water. It's good for you. My lips are chapped. I guess I'm not drinking enough.

What do I have to do tonight? Take Hannah to dance class, maybe. Ha! Don't have to get on the treadmill, though, because I'll go to basketball instead. I've got to find more referees for the stake season coming up. I don't want them calling too many games on a Saturday.

Only another 55 minutes left until I can eat my pizza. I love Papa John's pizza. Another email. This one's about our lab. Ok, ok! I'm going! Gotta get back to the lab. I should rewrite the ending to that story. It didn't make much sense.

Neither does this entry, I guess, but that's the way I think. Shaking my head won't make it any better, either.

And Kelly wonders why I keep forgetting things. There's just too much going on up there. All the new stuff won't fit.

-----------------

Open Letter

An Open Letter to the President of the United States

9 November 2012

Dear Mr. President...

Let me be honest about this right up front. I didn't vote for you in 2008 and I didn't vote for you in 2012. In fact, I'm a little amazed that ANYONE could vote for you either time. I shake my head and puzzle over it every day. With the economy the way it is, the unemployment rate the way it is, the national debt the way IT is, how could anyone vote for the guy who made it that way? That's you, by the way.

It's just unbelievable to me, frankly, given the fact that we had a very good man ready to take your seat in the Oval Office, who not only has business acumen but experience doing the job. He could have gotten us on the road to recovery. Simply put, Mr. President, if this had been a business you'd have been out on your butt long ago, pounding pavement like the other 20 million people who are out of work. And frankly, I think that's the way it should be.

But alas, here we Republicans are with the post-election blues, licking our wounds and hoping for a better day...soon. But though I do not like the outcome of Tuesday's election, I respect the democratic process and am grateful that we live in a land wherein we can cast our vote and let our voices be heard. If my guy lost (which he did), so be it. More props to the man who didn't.

Honestly, I wish you luck, Mr. President, and Godspeed. I hope you succeed in making this a better place to live. I really, really do. Even if it means electing another Democrat in four years, that's fine, as long as our country is back where it was meant to be...on top.

But doggone it, Mr. President, you work for me. I'm your boss. I, and the millions like me, are the ones to whom you should answer, not China, not Israel, not Iran or Iraq. Me! And though I didn't vote for you (either time), I'm still your boss.

So, accordingly, I'm going to do something I very rarely do. I'm going to give you a direct order.

Fix this economy!

Get people back to work!

Get us out of debt!

Tell the truth about Benghazi!

Work with the Republicans to clean up this fiscal cliff issue!

And when you get finished with all of that, quit bowing to foreign dignitaries! We're the United freaking States! We don't bow to anybody!

Do you understand me?

Now get to work and don't make me tell you again. Otherwise, I'm sure we'll all be seeing what the United States would have looked like had Jimmy Carter gotten a second term.

Very Sincerely,

Your boss
Stefan Schetselaar, et al.

-----------

Turn The Lights Out, The Party's Over

I didn't sleep very well last night. All night long I tossed and turned, nightmares of four more years dancing through my head. Four more like the last four.

Then I awoke and found, to my horror, that it wasn't really a nightmare at all...it was true.

Even the casual reader of my blog will know that I'm no fan of Barack Obama. I didn't vote for him in 2008 and I didn't vote for him in 2012. I've had signs in my yard both times touting the virtues of his opponents, and both times I've been disappointed and saddened by his victory.

Last time I kept my mouth shut.

This time, not so much.

As my good wife said to me this morning, "Did you really think we could get a good, decent, God-fearing man in the White House with the way our country is today?"

Exactly.

I retired last night before the final results were announced, but by 10:15pm it was already pretty apparent what those would be. I didn't see the "celebration" that took place in Chicago nor the disappointment etched on a good man's face. Both of those images were on the news this morning and caused me more pain than I was willing to endure. So I turned them off.

People were, I'm told, dancing in the streets celebrating this "victory". I'm happy that people enjoyed themselves, but let's take a quick look at what they had to be so happy about.

Millions of people are still out of work, many of them so disgusted with their prospects that they have quit looking.

The economy has lately shown signs of life, but it's still awful.

Gas prices are still high and the price of food has skyrocketed.

One in six children is still living in poverty.

Our good country is still $16 trillion dollars in debt and getting further into it every single day.

Same sex marriage became legal in another state, Maryland, as did legalized gambling.

Recreational use of marijuana was passed in Colorado and Washington.

Abortion is still legal in ALL states.

All great reasons to celebrate folks, but let me quote a VERY sage individual when I say that "it's too bad the country can't see that we needed REAL change by electing honest people and passing upstanding laws that are in our best interest and in line with our Maker's commandments."

Amen, brotha.

There are a couple of verses in the Book of Mormon that I think are very applicable to our current situation. They're located in the book of Mosiah, 29th chapter, 26th and 27th verses. It reads thus:

"Now it is not common that the voice of the people desireth anything contrary to that which is right; but it is common for the lesser part of the people to desire that which is not right; therefore this shall ye observe and make it your law—to do your business by the voice of the people.
And if the time comes that the voice of the people doth choose iniquity, then is the time that the judgments of God will come upon you; yea, then is the time he will visit you with great destruction even as he has hitherto visited this land."

Let me make myself perfectly clear here. I do not believe Barack Obama to be a wicked man. I think he really believes in what he's doing. Heck, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and say that he even believes he's the answer to all of our problems. But good man or not, our country is in TERRIBLE shape right now, worse than it was 4 years ago and worse than it's been in a long time. We needed that "REAL change" NOW, not in four years when he's brought us to our collective knees. The way our country is headed, who knows if we will even be here in 4 more years?

Let's be honest. This country, as a whole, does not keep the commandments of the Lord. There are good people out there to be sure, even great people, who do keep them. But by and large, we do what we want to do and say what we want to say no matter what the Lord thinks about it. In fact, we've relegated the Almighty to something we do on Sunday morning, if we feel like it, and then forget about the rest of the week.

Well, now is the time to be frank. There's a storm gathering out there. Not a storm of wind and rain and snow, though I imagine He might use nature to prove His point as well as anything else. Rather, it's a storm of wrath and destruction.

I know. I sound like a neocon Bible-thumper. I sound like a guy standing out in the street in a robe with a long beard and a sign that reads, "The End Is Near!". Believe me, I get it, but as it turns out, I also embrace it.

See, the Book of Mormon also talks about that, stating that in the last days people will say, "Eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow we die and it shall be well with us." I see that all around me...today. Legal marijuana, trillions of dollars spent every year, a ruler that fiddles while Rome burns.

All I have to say to that is this:

Better end the celebration a little early tonight, fellas, 'cause the Father of this family is on His way home and he's going to be pretty ticked off that you threw a party while He was away!

-----------------------

Sandy

The Lord has been very good to me.

Despite being blown around like a rag doll, soaked to the very bone, and pelted with rain and sleet by Sandy and her unforgiving wrath, my home, my trees, my cars and most importantly my family are all no worse for the wear.

Make no mistake about it. This was the Lord's doing.

Not dumb luck.

Not storm degradation.

Not just a sturdy house.

This was the Lord's doing. Period.

All around us there are trees that have fallen. Our next door neighbor had a relatively tall one fall in his yard (thankfully, not on his house). He was out there yesterday with his yard crew cutting it up and hauling it away.

Along my way to work this morning I saw a lot of trees that had been felled by Sandy's icy, uncaring hand. Shingles ripped from roofs. Streams terribly overflowing their banks. Debris littering the roads. Even a car or two stuck in the mud she left behind.

But we are fine.

Don't misunderstand. We were not totally spared. A leak in our living room window allowed quite a bit of water to seep in and get into the carpet. Thankfully, Jacob spotted it before it could do any damage to our computers, which sit right next that window. We laid plastic garbage bags down on the floor and then spread some towels over those in the particularly wet areas.

I went outside during the height of the storm and tried to stem the tide, so to speak, by putting some silicone caulking around the trim. It seemed to help a little, but I was freezing cold, caked with caulking and soaked to the bone.

But that was it. Literally. No other damage whatsoever.

With 60+ mph sustained winds, 80+ mph gusts and four and a half inches of rain at my house, you'd have thought there would be something more drastic.

A flooded basement.

A downed tree.

A cut or a scrape, maybe.

But no. Nothing but an easily remedied leak in a window, while all around us there was damage beyond belief costing in the tens of billions of dollars.

Why? I don't know. But what I do know is that it was the Lord that spared us.

There were times during the storm when I thought the house was going to blow off of its foundation. I thought for sure that one of our giant oaks in the backyard was

going to blow over on our house, or on one of our neighbors. I could vividly imagine our basement being flooded and having to spend thousands of dollars to get it cleaned up and repaired.

But as awful as it all was, a new day dawned (beautifully, see picture at left), the house is still standing, we are all fine, and we are still VERY blessed of the Lord.

All I can say is "Thank You."

-----------------

NOBAMA!!

I'm really ticked off.

I'll get to the reason in just a minute.

First, let me say that I am no fan of Mr. Obama (or is it Osama?), nor his failed policies. I did not vote for him in 2008 and I will not vote for him in 2012. Nor would I EVER vote for him. Tie me to a greased pig and let him run through a briar patch filled with black widow spiders and black mamba snakes and I would still vote for Pee Wee Herman before him. In my opinion he has been one of the worst presidents to ever "grace" the Oval Office. Therefore, you can take what I say with a pinch of salt.

One of my biggest pet peaves with this joker is that our wonderful country is now four TRILLION dollars further in debt than we were when he took over the watch, despite his promises otherwise. Because of him, and other greedy politicians in Washington, we are going to be repaying this debt until the cows come home, and their calves and then their grand-calves, and maybe more. None of them (politicians) know anything about the meaning of the phrase "living within your means".

Don't get me wrong. It's not totally his fault, though I fear that when he reads of Harry Truman he thinks that the phrase "the buck stops here" refers to antlers and venison. No, he's had plenty of help with spending my retirement and that of my kids and grandkids. Four TRILLION dollars further in debt, and in four years we'll be four TRILLION dollars deeper, and my great-grandkids won't have two dimes to rub together.

Do you realize how much four TRILLION dollar is? Let me put it this way. The average dollar bill is 0.010922 centimeters thick. If you piled four TRILLION of those Georges on top of each other (not length-wise or width-wise, but on top of each other like they used to be in your wallet before he stuck his fingers in there), you'd have a stack that was 43,688,000,000 centimeters high, or 271,464 miles high! The mileage from earth to the moon is only 238,857 miles, a relative cake walk compared to our debt. In other words, with that stack you would get to the moon and still have 32,607 MILES left over! Now, tell me, how am I, my kids, my grandkids and on and on and on (ad infinitum) going to pay that money back? You tell me, Mr. Obama!

When you mix in the abysmal unemployment rate, our troubles with the Middle East, lower take-home pay, the staggering economy, Syria, Libya, Russia and our constantly weakening military, not to mention a lot of other troubles we now face, this country is in a world of hurt. I honestly don't think this country has been in this bad of a situation since the Founding Fathers took their own lives in their hands and signed the Declaration of Independence.

But as bad as all that is, it's not the reason I'm so ticked off today. No, the reason for that is that, in my opinion, we have a President who is one of the most condescending individuals I have ever listened to. After watching last night's debate, which I am unbiased enough to call a draw, I am of the firm resolution that he thinks he's A LOT better than anyone else, especially Mitt Romney.

Here's why.

After telling the world that the United States Navy is smaller than it's been since 1917, Governor Romney was forced to listen to the following from our illustrious leader (and I use both of those terms VERY loosely):

"Well, Governor, we also have fewer horses and bayonets, because the nature of our military's changed. We have these things called aircraft carriers, where planes land on them. We have these ships that go under water, nuclear submarines."

Seriously? Is that the way you treat other people, Mr. Obama? If it is, it explains the awful mess our country is in right now. No wonder no one has any respect for us these days.

I've been thinking about it and I believe that if someone had said that to my face in front of the world, I might have entertained the notion of punching him in the nose. Thank goodness Governor Romney is a better man than me. My utmost respect goes to him for not losing his cool when baited that way by The Community Organizer. I, as hot-headed as I can be sometimes, might not have followed protocol and smiled like he did (and before you get any ideas, NO, I would not his the president, no matter how much I dislike him or his policies).

A few choice words come to mind to describe how I feel about this man. Suffice it to say that I literally feel physically ill when the thought comes to mind that he could possibly win another four years in office.

Please America, wake up! Join the other 47% who are voting with their children and grandchildren in mind. Join the 47% who value America and the standards that were set 200+ years ago. Turn your back on greed and incompetence and raise your voices high in the night with shouts of

NOBAMA!! ----------

Rain in Due Season

I think I've discovered the cure to most of the ills that are paralyzing this world, but I'll get to that in just a second.

Yesterday, as I sat in sacrament meeting, I listened to the speakers talk about keeping the Sabbath Day holy. It was a great meeting, but as I listened to the three speakers, all of whom referenced the same quotes and some of the same scriptures, I found myself wondering how many times I'd heard that particular topic spoken of in sacrament meeting or in Sunday School in my lifetime. Hundreds? Thousands maybe?

Then one of them quoted the 26th chapter of Leviticus.

Now, for those of you who don't know, one of my "hobbies", if you want to call it that, is memorizing scriptures. It just so happens that he was quoting verses 3 through 6, which I have studied relatively recently. The thing that struck me, though, was that he also added the second verse, which I have not yet memorized and which added a lot of new context to what I had already contemplated. Let me quote all of those verses for you.

2 Ye shall keep my sabbaths, and reverence my sanctuary: I am the Lord.

3 If ye walk in my statutes, and keep my commandments, and do them;

4 Then I will give you rain in due season, and the land shall yield her increase, and the trees of the field shall yield their fruit.

5 And your threshing shall reach unto the vintage, and the vintage shall reach unto the sowing time: and ye shall eat your bread to the full, and dwell in your land safely.

6 And I will give peace in the land, and ye shall lie down, and none shall make you afraid: and I will rid evil beasts out of the land, neither shall the sword go through your land.

Let me go back and start at verse 4. There, the Lord promises that He will give us rain when we need it, fruits and vegetables from the ground and from the trees. In verse 5 He says that our harvest will last until we harvest again and we will have plenty to eat. Finally, in verse 6 He says that He will give us peace, we'll be able to sleep safely, and we won't have to go to war.

Pretty good blessings, if you ask me.

And what do we have to do to get them?

The answer lies in verses 2 and 3. Keep the Sabbath Day holy, go to the temple, keep the commandments.

But, (and this is a big but) I'd also venture to say, without fear of reprisal, that the opposite of those verses is true, too. If we do NOT do these things, the Lord will NOT give us those blessings.

Frankly, I think we're in great need of every single one of those blessings right now.

Just look at some of the things going on in this country, and for that matter, in this world.

- Record-breaking drought in the United States
- People getting killed while watching a movie in Denver
- Wars in Afghanistan and Iraq
- Twenty-five million people out of work in the US
- The Euro at the brink of collapse
- Famine in Niger and Somalia
- Earthquake in Indonesia
- Wildfires in California, Idaho and Washington
- Civil war in Syria
- Nuclear proliferation in Iran

Do I really need to go on?

Back in ancient days, the Sabbath was a serious thing. No businesses were open, there were laws that governed its observance, and if someone violated the Sabbath, they were stoned. Today the Sabbath has become just another day off, a holiday, a time to get caught up on our yard work.

Disagree with me if you want, but I think that if the world was to revert to a remembrance and observance of the commandments, and specifically of the Sabbath Day, a lot of the world's ills would "magically" disappear. The heavens would open up on our crops, the hungry would be filled, wars would cease and men's anger would abate. The Spirit of the Lord would again be poured out without measure on this chosen country, and on the world.

In D&C 82, verse 10, the Lord states that, "I am bound when ye do what I say; but when ye do not what I say, ye have no promise." Couple that verse with the verses from Leviticus and you have a perfect cure for this world's ills. A righteous world receiving blessings from the Lord on a daily basis. Constant communication with our Heavenly Father. Inspiration and revelation being poured out without mixture.

I mean, it's worth a try, right? Nothing else seems to be working. As long as we continue to rely on the arm of man, we're going to remain exactly how we are now, and maybe worse. If we turn to the Lord, we have His promise that He'll help us.

And who better to have over a barrel than the Lord?

King's Dominion II

King's Dominion is my kind of place.

Especially when it's overcast, slightly rainy, and humid.

The reason for that is because that kind of weather scares off a lot of people.

Such was the case on Saturday when we packed up the car, braved I-95 (crawling), and went down to Richmond.

Usually I don't like Richmond much, though my nephew Michael seemed to like it on his mission. It's too hot for me, and way too humid. But if you're going to ride the Intimidator, you've got to take Mohammad to the mountain.

I didn't take a lot of pictures this weekend, as I was too busy riding the rides. Besides, it was sprinkling just a tad for some of the day, and I didn't want my camera getting all messed up. Suffice it to say that the picture of my sweet wife above (on The Avalanche) was my assessment of the day, too.

We rode all of the biggies. The Dominator, The Intimidator, The WindSeeker, The Grizzly, The Hurler, The Avalanche, Flight of Fear, The Shockwave, The Anaconda, The Berserker and yes, The Crypt. All fabulous rides. Just above is a video of Jacob's car going by on The Avalanche. You can get an idea of how fast it goes from that.

To the left is a shot I took from about the same place, of Hannah and Gammy's car going by. If you blow it up so you can see them really well (second car, from Germany), you'll see that Gammy's eyes are shut tight. The thing I noticed about the rides on Saturday is that they go the same speed and go to the same place whether you close your eyes or not. Sorry Gammy.

For those of you who don't know, Sofia is back living with us now. She's staying until August 23rd, when she'll go home to Spain. She came and lived with us last summer as a foreign exchange student. This summer she just decided to come back and spend some time with us. She went with us to King's Dominion, too. I think that by the end of the day she was pretty worn out...just like the rest of us.

All good things must come to an end, I guess, and all in all it was a great day. My favorite ride was either The Intimidator (steep ascent, 85 degree fall, 2G's and then zero-G's made me see stars, literally) or The Dominator (which I wrote about last time). I also liked Flight of Fear (0-60 in about two seconds and the whole ride is in the dark). But I think if you asked Hannah which one she liked the best, it would either be The Avalanche or the one pictured at the left. It was called The Scrambler...a family ride...and yes, it was one of the best. Those oldies but goodies are always some of the best, aren't they?

Tomorrow's Leftovers

This is most likely my last post about our trip to Europe. What in the world was that? Did I just hear cheering from somewhere in the back? As Jack Benny used to say, "Well!"

If you've read any of my other posts, you'll know that we went on a tour of the Ring of Kerry on our first or second full day in Ireland. On our trip back into Killarney we made our way out of the mountains and down into the valley where Killarney is. While we were descending we stopped at an overlook and the picture to the left was taken. It's one of my favorites of the whole trip and I thought you might like to see it. There are three lakes in and around Killarney. They are called Lough Leane (which is the largest of the three), Muckross Lake and Upper Lake. I THINK this one is Upper Lake, but don't quote me on that.

A couple of days later we started on our journey through Wales and into England. I mentioned that our bus had to go through a very narrow arch in a town called Conwy where the castle wall is all the way around the town. To the right you will see a photo of that passageway taken from my seat on the bus. Our bus went through this passage twice and another one just like it another time without incident. Our sister bus was not so lucky. Their door got ripped off when they went through this arch a little too far to the left. We didn't think too much of it until our bus broke down later in the day and the only spare bus was given to the folks without a door.

Conwy was my favorite stop of the whole trip. Jacob and I walked through the castle and then, after lunch, all the way around the town on top of the wall. These last few photos were taken on that excursion.

To the left you will see a photo of Jacob looking through one of the many archways around the castle. He's looking into the town of Conwy, which is on the shores of the Conwy River. The castle was built in the late 13th century, not only as a defense for those who lived in the castle and in the town, but as a watchtower to make sure no unwanteds made their way up river.

Right next to the castle, which, of course, dominates the town, there is a lawn bowling green (called Boche). You can see it off to the left in this picture. I stood and watched the men play Boche for quite some time while Jacob explored the inner bowels of the castle. As I'd watched it in Argentina a few times, I found it very interesting.

The real reason I took this photo, though, is because I thought the new-fangled train running so close to this ancient castle was pretty cool

We climbed all over that castle, from the basement to the ramparts to the citadels to the turrets to...well, you get the idea. While we were in one of the towers, we heard a tiny little voice. "Jacob!" it said. Craning our necks to better hear where the cry was coming from, we finally looked down and saw three puny little dots on the lawn below. Lo and behold, that was where the voice was coming from. It was Jacob's three buddies all standing together looking at us and waving. You can see from the picture above that we were pretty high above the ground. We could barely hear them and they could not hear us.

While we were walking around the town, I must have literally taken about 120 shots. I won't bore you with them, but I will show you the one I thought was kind of funny. If you really wanted to, you could climb up one some of the citadels and do a lot of exploring. Jacob, being a teenager, has that temporary gene lodged somewhere in his head, so he had to climb up places I wouldn't go, even on a bet. I was uncomfortable enough just being on the wall itself. You see, I have a bad case of fear of heights. Jacob obviously has no such aversions.

But in one place his adventurous climbing was curtailed by the sign you can see behind him in the picture above. Just in case you can't read it, it says, "It is dangerous to climb on the stonework."

Thus ends my posts about our European trip. I must say, though, that it's been pretty fun this week to watch the Olympics and be able to say, "Hey, I've been there!" and then hear Jacob say, "So have I!"

And only a couple of weeks ago, to boot.

Leftovers, or What's for Dinner?

Since finishing the last installment of our trip to Ireland and the UK, I've been thinking that there were some things I left out. There were pictures I didn't show you and tales I didn't tell. So now, for the first time anywhere in print, here are the leftovers.

As you may remember, on our first day in Killarney we rode around in a horse buggy, called a jaunty car, with Delilah our horse and Mike our driver. On the way to Ross Castle Mike showed us the ruined castle on the left. This, he said, is a leprechaun castle.

I quickly scanned around for yellow moons, orange stars and green clovers, while he explained to us (picture of the boys in the band to the right) that the small holes in the wall are where the leprechauns climb and rest their weary bones for the night. While I didn't see Lucky anywhere, I could have sworn I hear a tiny voice say, "They're always after me lucky charms!"

On that same day, as we drove around the Ring of Kerry, we stopped and watched some dogs do their thing with the sheep. Um, ok. Anyway, these dogs were so impressive that they inspired Jacob to tell me for the rest of the trip (and even since we've been back) that he wants to be a sheep herder. He wants to have dogs just like those in the picture to the left. I can't say that I blame him, though. They were REALLY impressive dogs.

I've included a video I took of one of them doing his stuff which you can see by clicking just below. It's not the greatest video in the world, but it does give you a quick understanding of what we were watching. It was amazing.

Just as a courtesy so you can tell what in the heck is going on in the video, the dog in question ran up the hill (a big hill) and herded those sheep from right to left to right to left, changing direction whenever the shepherd blew his little whistle. Each movement was controlled by a different type of sound, but the dog knew exactly what each one meant. In fact, each dog was trained with different sounds, so when the shepherd blew a certain sound, only the dog he wanted to control would react. Like I said, very, very impressive. Wish I could get my own no-account dog to do some of that stuff. She has a hard enough time with "Sit!"

If you've read ANY of my entries herein, you'll note that we spent A LOT of time on the bus. I mean, the majority of our time was either in the bed or on the bus. It's funny, though. The activity of one bled over into the activity of the other. What do I mean? Well, there was a lot of the activity in the picture at the right going on in both bed and bus. In other words, we slept a lot on this trip, whether lying prostrate or leaning our head against a window as the scenery whizzed by.

As you can see from that picture of Jacob above, he was perfectly content to rest his head against the window and let his teeth chatter uncontrollably with the passing of each pothole. Others, like the one on the left, were not quite as anxious to do that. They just did the old man, saggy neck thang. I must admit, I've been guilty of this, even when I'm in the comfort of my own house.

Then there were the select few in our company who absolutely HAD to get a couple extra winks, as going to bed after midnight and then getting up before the roosters crowed was starting to make all of us a lot older than we really are. And we looked like it, too. Those people, the daring ones, bought Batman masks and used those neck pillow things to make seem like home. An example, the Dancing Queen, on the right.

I think that's where I'll leave it for today. I don't want to bore you too much. I know my writing is almost unreadable, so I'll save the rest for another day. Besides, all this talk of sleeping is making me bleary-eyed.

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Coming soon - Tomorrow's leftovers

Last Day in the Good 'Ole UK

I believe I forgot to mention yesterday that we went back to our hotel at about 7pm because we were just thrashed. I guess we could have stayed down in London town a lot longer, and soaked in the beauty of her mere presence, but we were dog tired. So, we caught the Tube, caught the train and hoofed it back where we ordered pizza and just lazed around for the rest of the evening. Yes, sawing logs was the order of the evening.

The next day we didn't have to be on the bus until noon, so we all slept in. That is, except for the people who went on to Paris. They had to be up at 4am to catch the bus to catch the train to go to The City of Lights. Me? I'm glad we didn't go. We would have been so tired, it just would not have been worth it. Besides, a lot of them slickity Paris folk went to see "Wicked" last night (a sort of Broadway play), and so were not even in their beds until after midnight. And then up, showered, shaved, packed and downstairs getting on the bus at 4am? No thanky, brotha. Ah'll stay rat cheer.

So, we caught the bus at just a little before noon, rode to Heathrow Airport (this time without all of the convoluted mess we had to go through the first time), and went through security. They hadn't even assigned our flight to a gate yet, so we went to some random gate and sat for about an hour, buying chocolate and trying to find somewhere Jacob could eat (does this sound like it's a familiar theme of this trip?).

When they finally assigned us a gate, we caught the lift (we call it an elevator) and rode the train to our destination. We sat there for about another hour, talked about who knows what and ate some chocolate. I also called Kelly for the last time on the European phone we'd purchased before we left. For the most part it worked like a champ. Then it was finally time to climb on board the plane and sit for 8 hours.

You can see the takeoff from the video at the top. You can see the clouds of England and the Atlantic in the pix to the right and left. We watched movies, read a little bit, slept, and talked. But for the most part we just sat and sat and sat. Man, was my booty ready to get off of that plane.

We saw castles, we saw bog bodies, we ate different food and saw places we'd never seen before. We went to Abbey Road, saw the Book of Kells, walked around the Conwy Castle and rode on double-decker buses. We saw things that were thousands of years old, kissed the Blarney Stone, watched the changing of the guard and rode the London Eye. We saw Shakespeare's birthplace, saw the Tower Bridge, listened to Big Ben chime and went through Westminster Abbey. Every one of those things we REALLY, REALLY cool and I'd do any one of them again in a New York minute.

But the one thing, above all, I'll remember most about this trip is the smile on Kelly's face as we stepped out of the door and back into American air. I was so happy to see that smile again. It melted my heart.

I really missed her.

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Coming soon - Leftovers, or What's For Dinner?

Abbey Road

"Here come old flattop he come grooving up slowly
He got joo-joo eyeball he one holy roller..."

Ride the train.

Ride The Tube.

Ride the bus?

Yea. Sounds sorta like a Steve Martin movie, doesn't it? Trains, tubes and buses.

Those aren't pillows!!

Sitting on my pillows for so long is giving me a bad case of bus-roids. Thankfully, no more buses after today. So, suck is up and act like a man.

First stop...St. Paul's Cathedral.

You want facts? I got the facts, ma'am.

Designed by Sir Christopher Wren and built in the 17th century, it is one of the most recognizable landmarks in all of London. It is where Charles and Diana were married in 1981 (has it really been THAT long?) and where they had the funerals for Winston Churchill and the Duke of Wellington (I love his beef).

There is an iconic photograph that was taken of St. Paul's during The Blitz in World War II. It is of the cathedral, through all of the smoke, still standing. I believe the name of it is "St. Paul's Survives". I've included it here on the left.

After we saw all of the obligatory sights from the comfort of our motor coach (shouldn't have been calling it a bus all this time), they stopped at Buckingham Palace, made sure all of us knew how to get back to the hotel (which was about an hour's ride back on the train), and then they again RELEASED THE KRAKEN. I know. It IS addicting saying that.

The day before, Jacob and I decided what we were going to do, so we had a plan, Stan. Lots of Tube-hopping, but we had an all-day pass for whatever public transportation we wanted. Money!!

So, we watched changing of the guard, then bid farewell to our more-than-helpful tour guide (Emilia), who had been with us since we landed in Shannon, Ireland. With that, we walked across Green Park, got on the north-bound Jubilee line and headed for what I hoped would be a really cool place...Abbey Road.

One of my very first memories is watching the Ed Sullivan Show back in 1964 when the Beatles made the first appearance on the show. I remember thinking that, despite the hysteric shrieks of the girls in the audience, these guys would never make it. They held their guitars too long. That would never catch on.

Hey, I was only five. Give the little guy a break.

Since getting a little more musical sense into my head in the latter part of the 70s, I've always been a big Beatles fan. My favorite album has always been Sgt. Pepper, but I also like a lot of the Abbey Road album, too. So, it was with great anticipation that I got off The Tube and walked the five or so blocks to the iconic crosswalk. May I say that it was a lot different than I had expected, but still pretty danged cool. The picture above isn't the best one we took that day, but it is the only one I've got with Jacob in it, too. He's George Harrison and I'm Paul McCartney, sans cancer stick.

You can just see, to the right in the picture, a pole with a ball on the top. There is one just like it on the other side of the road. Every now and then the balls will flash and the cars in the road are supposed to stop and let pedestrians cross. That's what you do if you want to take a picture here. You wait at the side of the road for those balls to flash, then you run out into the middle, stop and get someone to take your picture.

I'm sure that the good folks who live near here are so used to people stopping in the middle of the road that they almost expect to see it when they run to the grocery store or whatever.

I don't think you can really tell from the two pictures I've included (the best one is to the right, taken by Jacob), but when we were posing it was raining. As soon as we got finished, the heavens opened up for about five minutes and just soaked us as we walked back to the Tube station.

By the time we got back to "downtown" London, it was time for something to eat. Quick! Is there a BK close by?

No, but there was something just as good when we came out of the Tube station into Piccadilly Circus (London's version of Time's Square, to the right).

Pizza Hut!!

Yes!

Score another one for the not-so-little guy. All you can eat pizza and we got to pay for it with that Monopoly money they call pounds. Gather 'round the good stuff, baby! Jacob's got something good to eat tonight!

After stuffing our faces, we walked the five or six blocks to Trafalgar Square (left). When I visited her back in the 80's, there were so many pigeons that you could put a little bit of bird seed on your head and the pigeons would land on your noggin and eat right there. Of course, you took the chance that they'd leave something else, too, but it seemed worth it.

Since then they've gotten a hawk to take care of the pigeon population. Jacob didn't get the opportunity to have the birds poop on his head, but he still got to climb up on Nelson's Column and sit on one of the four lions that guard it. To the right you can see him standing next to it on the column. Below you can see him sitting on the same lion's back.

Look closely at that second picture. You'll notice he's not even looking at the camera. That's because he's looking at the police officer (Bobby) who is telling him to get down. My son, the law-breaker.

After Trafalgar Square we rode the bus below to Westminster Abbey. Of course, they don't let you take pictures in there, so I'm not including any.

This has always been one of my favorite places in London. The abbey was started in 1245 by Henry III and has been the site of Queen Elizabeth's marriage and Prince William's marriage to Kate, and it holds the remains of Geoffrey Chaucer, Isaac Newton (love his fig cookies), Charles Darwin, and Henry VIII. They're buried right there in the floor, too! I mean, you walk right on top of them. Nothing like walking on the Kings and Queens of England!

Just outside of Westminster Abbey is a great view of the Elizabeth Tower, which holds Big Ben (I kept waiting to see Charlie Chaplin hanging from the big hand). By this time, it was about 3:20pm, it hadn't been too long since we'd heard Big Ben do his business, and we were not anxious to walk all the way over across the bridge to take his picture again. So, we took it right where we were. "Drop 'em where you stand, pard!"

There was really only one other place we wanted to go after seeing Parliament. "It's like putting on a five dollar hat on a nickel head (It's about that hat rack)". That was the Tower of London. Another London highlight.

Just a few quick Tube stops away and we were right next to the Tower of London. I'd looked forward to this for a good long while, as I'd gotten my picture taken with a Beefeater and one of those iconic guards with the tall hats the last time I was here. Alas, I made a big rookie mistake this time. I didn't pay for us to go in.

I know. What was I thinking, right? Moron goes all the way to London and doesn't take his son in to see the Beefeaters? I should be shot.

What kind of knucklehead...? I'll be paying for this one for the rest of my life. Really.

The cost was something like 21 pounds or something like that. Came out to about $35 or so. And you couldn't put a crowbar in your wallet and take your kid in? You nimrod!!

To his credit, Jacob told me, while we stood there, that it was too expensive and we didn't need to go in. And again to his credit, he hasn't said a word about it to me since we got home. But I know that deep down in that rich little heart of his, it almost killed him to not go in. I haven't learned anything in this life, have I?

Directly behind the Tower of London is the Tower Bridge. You can see our picture in front of it to the left. If you look really closely you can see the Olympic rings on the bridge. Nice place.

But I still should have taken him in, no matter what the price.

Next time, little brother. Next time.

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Coming soon - Last day

London Calling

London calling, yes I was there too.
An' you know what they said - well some of it was true!

But before we get there, we have a full day of other things to get around to.

Like go to Anne Hathaway's house (on the right).

It seems there was this little fellow who lived back in the 15- and 1600's who wrote a few little plays and stories and such like that. I guess he had a sort of "following" back in the day, and even today some people like to read his stuff. You might have heard of him. His name was William Shakespeare. Anne Hathaway was his sweetie pie.

The cottage is in Stratford-Upon-Avon, a lovely little town on the banks of the Avon River. The flower gardens surrounding it are gorgeous and they are actually raising cabbage, beans, peas and host of other veggies. After her death, the house stayed in her family through the mid-1800s. Now it's owned by the Shakespeare Birthplace Trust, which conducts all of the tours and such.

I've read a lot about their relationship and some suppose that William grew to dislike and even hate Anne. I'm not sure about all of that, but it seems to me, after spending time in that house, that they loved each other very much, though he spent a lot of time in London with this plays.

Be all of that as it may, it was fun to spend time in her home. As you exit, there is a bulletin board (above) full of little sticky notes. What you're supposed to do is tell about how you met your significant other on a sticky, then tack it to the board. As you can see, many people obey.

In true Shakespearean fashion, I did so, too, but did it in verse form. I only had about 30 seconds to think about what I could write, so it's not anything fancy. But you can see the results just above. See? Even in England I was thinking about you, sweetie!

Now, I've been a fan of the Bard for any number of years. I love Hamlet, have memorized parts of Macbeth and Henry V, and can even quote a sonnet or two. So being able to go to the house (left) where he was born...priceless.

They have beds there that were being used when little Billy was just a pup. They have actual utensils and cooking implements he might have actually used.

The only problem with the time we were able to spend in his house is that it went by WAY too fast. Not only that, but Jacob hadn't eaten all day. So finding a place that served something his finicky pallet would accept took quite a bit of our time. As far as we could tell, there's no BK hanging out on the corner in this little burg (Wiki pic at right). Plus, daddy had to desperately find a place to, um, shall we say, call his bookie. So, we wandered the streets until we found a place that made chicken nuggets, blasted out of there with nuggets in hand like our pants were on fire, and got back to the bus as the last ones on. Whew! Talk about your whirlwind romance!

The next stop on the road to London was Oxford. You know, the university I couldn't go to even if I wanted to? This town, for centuries called "The Most Beautiful Town in England", partly because of its famous Dreaming Spires, has more than the university, though. It also has Christ Church (left). Christ Church is not only a cathedral, but a working college.

Started in 1525, its members include Albert Einstein, William Penn, Lewis Carroll, John Locke (hurray Lost!), and John Wesley. Founded, suppressed and refounded by Henry VIII ("I got married to the widow next door, she'd been married seven times before, hick!"), it is the setting for many famous adventures, such as Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, and will probably be interesting to some of my readers because The Great Hall was used in the Harry Potter movies. You can see my picture of it on the right above. Was that a snowy owl I just saw fly by?

You might also recognize the steps in the picture to the left. These are the actual steps that were used in some of the opening scenes of the first Harry Potter movie, Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone (in the US you might know it as Sorcerer's Stone). Don't ask me who the gal is in the photo. She climbed up there to get her picture taken just as I was snapping my picture. I didn't feel like waiting for her to move.

When we got finished buying Jacob another sweatshirt (this one from Oxford) we got back on the bus and drove to our final destination...London. Can you hear that? It's Big Ben!

I'll save you all of the boring facts about going to the hotel, catching a train, riding the subway, etc, etc, etc. Suffice it to say that we finally got to London and got on the London Eye (giant Ferris wheel across the Thames from Big Ben) that carries you way above the city skylights, and scares the wee wee out of anyone afraid of heights (I'm raising my hand). I was not anxious to go near the edge of our gondola, instead preferring to remain at the center, lest I have some embarrassing staining issues in front of everyone. But I did get in, and ride around, as you can see above. That's the Elizabeth Tower behind us. It's where Big Ben actually is.

INTERESTING FACT ALERT

Did you know that Big Ben is not the name of the tower, but only the bell that is contained within? Yea, neither did I. It was probably named in honor of a guy named Benjamin Hall back in 1856. Now you have something semi-interesting to tell your nietos, don't you?

After riding the London Eye, we ate, we saw, we rode The Tube/train back to our hotel. When we finally got there, literally at about 1am, I walked down to the front desk and called a cab.

Ruh roh.

Something wrong?

Yea. Jacob was hungry.

The restaurant in the hotel was closed, the kabob place down the street was closed, and so were all of the pizza joints I called. Including Dominos.

So what did we do? Well, like I said, we called a cab. "And where did you take that cab?" he asks knowingly. If I tell you that there was a red-haired clown in the window, a giant, golden M in the front of the establishment and a big box of chicken McNuggets in our lap as we rode away, will that give you a good enough clue?

But oh, boy. Ground up chicken lips never tasted so good!

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Coming soon - Part VII - Abbey Road

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

Yea, I know. It looks like I lay down on my keyboard when I was typing the title of this entry. But I really didn't. That's the name of a town we stopped in today. It's Welsh for "The church of Mary in the hollow of the white hazel near the fierce whirlpool and the church of Tysilio by the red cave." If you'd like to hear how it's pronounced, go here. More on that town a little later.

Early this morning we got up in Dublin and headed by bus, of course, to a port where we caught a ferry over to Wales. It was more than your average, every day ferry, though. It was ENORMOUS. Unfortunately, I do not have a picture of it, but the picture above is the view I had from my seat. From here I was watching the clouds and rain go by. It rained the whole way across the Irish Sea. I mean, it rained! You can't really see that from the picture, but trust me, it poured. The picture to the right is of the inside of the one of the nine floors. If you look closely, or if you blow up the picture, you can see that the woman sitting there is picking her nose. Can anyone say "snack time"? OK, that wasn't called for.

While we were on the "luxury liner", Jacob and his buddies played hide and seek on several of the floors. I only saw them about two times during the whole three hour tour (I've heard that somewhere before), but I figured they weren't going anywhere, right? I just sat in my seat and relaxed, read, played some games and dozed.

When we finally arrived in Wales it had stopped raining, thankfully. But before we knew it, we were through security (Passport, please. All right, have a nice time in Wales) and back on the bus. To the left you'll see Jacob with one of his buddies as we stepped off of the ferry. Gymru is how they spell it.

We were only in Wales for about six or seven hours, but one of those hours was spent in the aforementioned lovely little town of "The church of Mary in the hollow of the white hazel near the fierce whirlpool and the church of Tysilio by the red cave" (easier to say it that way).

Jacob ate a cookie and bought a sweatshirt for himself and one for his sister, we went over to the train station and took a few pictures and then it was time to, you guessed it, (all together now!) GET ON THE BUS, GUS! "Oh joy! Rapture"!

To the left you'll see Jacob getting back on the bus (he wasn't even forced!), and if you look closely you'll see our new bus driver. I don't remember his name right off, but he was grumpy. Just look at his face, for Pete's sake!!

Now, imagine, if you can, riding along on a Greyhound-type bus with a grumpy bus driver (Danny left us in Ireland - alas, no more Riverdance), the heater cranked up so far that it literally burns skin, and 50-60 tired, sweaty hungry folks headed for no-one-knows-where (but I bet it had a LONG name!).

That's the situation in which we found ourselves after leaving The Church of Mary (for short). And to top it all off, the bus broke down! Sitting by the side of the road while our bus driver threw a wet towel on the engine to cool it down, we were treated to The Village People and The Electric Slide. People dancing in the aisles, flailing their arms and hands all over the place, with the music set on full. Want proof? I give you, as evidence (to the right), The Dancing Queen (she's going to kill me).

Once the bus had cooled down a bit, we were back on the road again ("Like a band of gypsies we go down the highway").

We finally made it to a little town named Conwy, Wales, where our tour director cut us loose. She said she wanted us back in 3 1/2 hours, but other than that, we could do what we wanted.

Can you say "Release the Kracken"?

I just had to say that again.

So, here we are in this small town with a MONSTER castle called Conwy Castle and nothing else to do. Now this I can dig. What a paintball war grounds this place would make! It was SWEEEEEET!!

Built in 1288 by King Edward I, this place had battlements, draw bridges, dungeons and a wall that surrounded the entire town! We stopped in a little restaurant and ate some fish and chips (Jacob had chicken and chips), but the rest of the time we spent exploring the castle and walking the entire length of the wall. Talk about cool. This was one of my favorite parts of the trip.

While we were walking around the wall, we came to the little archway shown in the picture below.

Look carefully. You see Jacob on the other side? He's not holding his head, right? That means he looked at the little sign toward the top left of the arch and followed its advice.

Did his dad? You want to see the divot in my cranium?

I honestly didn't see the sign and didn't even notice that the archway was MUCH shorter than I am. Being short my whole life I'm not used to having to duck.

I mean seriously, how short were these people? The funny thing is, I took this picture BEFORE I whacked my head. How stupid am I?

No blood, thankfully, but I had a nice-sized headache the rest of the day, courtesy of Edward I, and an indentation in my skull that's only now starting to feel better. Thanks a lot Eddie.

It took us about an hour, but we finally made it all the way around the wall, just in time to get back on the bus. Coming into the town there is a very narrow archway that all buses must drive through to get to the castle. Our grumpy butt driver got our bus through it just fine, but our sister bus, with other kids from our same school, did not fare well. Their front door was ripped off. How's that for some fancy driving?

Little did we know that this would affect us a few minutes down the road.

So, here we are, motoring toward Manchester, England, everyone tired, hot and a little peevish, and what happens? You got it. The bus broke down again.

More dancing. More wet towels draped over the engine. More Village People. Argh!!

Now, I literally have several thousand songs on my Ipod and a couple hundred more on my Kindle Fire, both of which I had in my hands at this particular time. But I have absolutely ZERO by The Village People and ZERO that even mention sliding, much less with electricity. We had to listen to both, plus Adele.

Oh, please, sweet heaven, take me now!!

Coming soon - Part VI - London Calling